"A bit of excitement this morning. I went out the east garage door to top-off the triple feeder. On the sidewalk I saw where a large bird left its wing print. Second clue: not one songbird in sight."

          "Cooper's Hawk."

"Yup."
"Snow was blowing and drifting so fast. Knew it had to be a very fresh print. Immature Coop holding its breakfast flew to the back fence but it could see me and was too nervous to stay. Went west out of the yard. Didn't even thank me for keeping the feeders full."

"It's snowing pretty steady now. About 30 degrees and a strong wind. About the best scenario we could hope for if ... Big If ... it stays cold."

          "Groan, lecture alert!"

"You love it and you know it."
"Take notes."
"Our eminent Weather Channel, perverted purveyor of Storm Stories and other Bull-shit, predicts a steadily rising temperature until 5 o'clock. If it turn to freezing rain you might have to help me hold our trees up."

"Now here's something that should give you a tickle. I am actually using the Keurig. Yes, actually using it to impersonate a coffee maker."
"But there's a twist. I'm grinding beans super fine like an espresso brew and refilling the used K-cups."
"Look, it's your fault. You left me a year's supply of Newman's Own Special Blend - specifically designed to mimic Pearl Rebehn coffee."
"You know there is no way I could trash all that plastic. That's even worse than drinking all that N.O.S.B. Now all I have to do is convince Elaine to use the Newman's stuff and trade in the empties."

"Oops, weather alert coming in - gotta run."
"Love You"